dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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