I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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