I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize
