A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I love having hate sex.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
