You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
