First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
