you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
