he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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