hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
where am i from again
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Randomize
