i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
