K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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