i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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