I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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