ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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