What a fucking waste of an outfit
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
