Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize