Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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