dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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