Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
