oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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