Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
