Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
