My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
