i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
