If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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