i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Randomize
