This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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