If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
