kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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