That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
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