All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize
