She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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