Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
