Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Randomize
