I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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