do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize
