brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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