So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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