i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
