Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I think your dad took our porno
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Randomize
