North Korea, Best Korea!
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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