you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Randomize
