He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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