actually, I'm a sock model
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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