do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
