New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
sarcasm needs its own font
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
