I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I think i peed on brittanys purse
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
