Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
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