I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
