You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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