Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I fill condoms, not promises.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Randomize
